DAVID LETTERMAN's Top Ten 'Things House Plants Have to Say”

• Below, check out David Letterman's Top Ten "Things House Plants Have to Say", as presented on the Wednesday, Feb. 6 broadcast of the LATE SHOW with DAVID LETTERMAN, seen weeknights (11:35 PM12:37 AM, ET/PT) on the CBS Television Network.
• From the home office in Wahoo, Nebraska...

10. "Watching you eat salad is creepy."

9. "Please ask the dog to stop 'watering' me."

8. "I had the most amazing photosynthesis last weekend."

7. "Your wife is sleeping with the UPS guy."

6. "I'm not going back on tour with Led Zeppelin." (Oh, I'm sorry, that's what Robert Plant has to say.)

5. "I absorb the CO2 you exhale - maybe try a breath mint."

4. "I'd like to thank the people of Colorado and Washington for legalizing me."

3. "For the love of God, put on some pants."

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